Sunday, August 5, 2012
Old Friends
I had lunch with an old friend today. Someone I hadn't seen in about 12 years. When we met I think I was probably drinking every time I saw him. Lunch today was different- I ordered lemonade. It seems small but it is moments like this that let me know I am not worried about perception anymore. I don't care if my old friends know I don't drink anymore. My thinking that I had to be drinking to be "fun" were ridiculous. It does seem silly when I think about it. Why would I spend so much time worried about how other people felt about me being sober? I did though and for a lot of years it was one of my great excuses to keep drinking.
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Oh, I so relate. My 2 best friends do not know that I have become active in AA and am almost a year sober. Oh, I'm sure they have an idea, because I was stumbling drunk around them many times.. and all of a sudden I'm not. But I still can't get past the hurdle of telling them. Is it just me trying to hang on to a way "out?"
ReplyDeleteThe gig is up, so I just need to get it over with and I will have 2 friends who are closer to me.
Thanks for the idea. I identify. :)