Saturday, August 7, 2010

More relapse dreams and extreme tiredness

I another relapse dream last night. It was another instance of me drinking before I even realized I wasn't supposed to. I felt extremely guilty in my dream and dreaded the thought of having to start my counter all over again.  My thoughts are that this points to the idea that drinking was just second nature to me- that I would grab a drink before I gave any thought to the destructiveness.
I am so tired. I woke up early this morning (5:00 am) then went back to bed at 10 and slept until 12:00. Got up, ate a sandwich and went back to sleep for another 3 hours. I feel like I could sleep all weekend.

3 comments:

  1. Those dreams are disturbing, but normal.

    I once had a gentleman with over 20 years sobriety tell me he still had them on occasion and the fact that he woke from them shaken showed his commitment to sobriety.

    I hope you get some rest!

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  2. jack says he has bad dreams too.

    i don't know if you believe in healing crystals but i use them for strength and they bring me a sense of peace.

    i just recently got an amethyst crystal for jack to wear around his neck. it is suppose to help with bad dreams and warding off cravings/addictions. sounds perfect for him. i have not gotten it to him yet though.

    a lot of people think this is mumbo jumbo, my husband included but you know what? i like it and just having something around my neck that i can touch brings me a sense of calm and peace and helps me turn things right over to God instead of hanging on. so, say what you will but they are helping me. maybe they can help you too.

    daisy

    i'm thinking about doing a post on them. do you think that would be a good idea?

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  3. I went into detox almost two years ago, and I just dreamed the other night that I used pills. ... it was weird: I didn't remember until some time after I woke up that this was the subject of my dream.

    For me, usually this means that I need to surrender in my life somehow. Quite often, it involves surrender of self-will.

    Sometimes, it's just a fluke: it doesn't mean anything.

    It certainly doesn't mean I WANT or AM GOING to use/drink.

    But in early recovery drinking dreams can be very upsetting because sometimes after we use/drink in the dream, we can feel the effects--or else, we CAN'T feel the effects, and we're frustrated--and either way, we feel screwed over. Was my experience, anyhow.

    What really helped me (especially with my energy levels) was to make progress in the steps and to get good sleep and regular very, very vigorous exercise. In fact I now consider exercise my medicine.

    with every good wish, --G

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